Six things couples must do for themselves even though they have a Wedding Planner

These days many brides say with great relief, “I have a wedding planner.  He/she is handling everything for me.”  In fact, wedding planners can handle just about every aspect of your wedding, but there are areas that belong exclusively to the bride and groom.  I have listed six such areas.

 Assignment of Seats. 

It takes longer to explain the family dynamics to me than it does to just make the seat assignments. I can get the seating cards printed and make sure place cards are in the correct places, but the plan has to come from you.

Wedding budget

I can give you ideas and suggestions about how to allocate the total but I cannot determine the amount you have to spend.   

The members of your bridal party 

No one else can do this for you – nor should they.

Write your own vows  

You can use the standard vows offered by your church or officiant, but if you want to have your own, you need to write them yourself.  If needs be, you may have to edit your drafts as often as you need to until they are saying what you want them to.

Ceremony Music 

Generally, Wedding Planners have lists of music that others have chosen, but it is your wedding and you should have music that is meaningful to you.  This choice assumes that you have spoken with the officiant and you understand the church’s view of music to be played.

Thank you notes. 

Your guests came to your wedding and gave you a gift.  The least you can do is show your appreciation by thanking them.  You and the groom may decide to split the notes and each write half, but the couple must do it.

Wedding planners and coordinators can be a huge help in not only assisting you with your wedding plan, but also doing the work necessary to execute your plan. For more suggestions and assistance, get in touch with TriniWeddings at 868 624-4014 or email mwilt@triniweddings.com.

What every bride should know about her Mother’s role.

The mother of the bride has a very special place in the wedding planning process.  This special role is there whether or not your mother chooses to accept it.  For some mothers it is a Herculean task while others embrace it as the role of a lifetime. But what is important in all of this, is that she is included. 

With families frequently separated by miles, jobs, schools or divorce, parental roles have changed.  What has not changed is the importance of including your mother in the planning process wherever possible.  Occasionally I have met mothers who feel left out of the plans.

It is always great for you to involve your groom in the plans but not to the exclusion of your mother.  Your mother can make wonderful suggestions – so solicit her opinions and advice.  Chances are that she is experienced in dealing with things like receptions, parties, caterers and florists.

The person who should accompany you when you are selecting your wedding gown should be your mother.  Today’s tendency to bring the entire wedding party and solicit each of their opinions on THE GOWN generally is not a productive event. Your mother knows you, your tastes and your dreams. After all, she has known you for all your life.

She is also a good resource for choosing wedding accessories and gifts for your attendants.  She is the perfect person to take charge of the master guest list.  She can eliminate duplicates, help make decisions on the final list and gather the addresses.

Seek advice on, or let her plan the seating arrangements for the reception.  She’ll be the one who knows who should sit with whom and who shouldn’t be at the same table.

Among all your friends, she’ll be the best at helping you put things in perspective when you feel overwhelmed by it all.  That’s what moms do!

However, there may be times when you are inclined to feel that she wants to take over and force you to accept her opinions and advice, but this is the perfect time for you to enter another level of bonding and let her know that it is your big day and your views count too.

I have had to do quite a bit of conflict resolution between brides and their mothers. Some mothers are of the view that because they are financing the wedding, their wants should override the bride’s.  A few brides who have opted for DIY weddings have come to Triniweddings  for a consultation, just to sort out wedding planning conflicts. So when and if things seem to ever be getting out of hand with mom, a Wedding Consultant may be your best bet!

The Role of The Father of The Bride

                                                                   

It may not seem like it to him, but I have found that brides who are particularly close to their father worry about him and his feeling as the entire family gets involved in wedding planning.  He may feel left out or uncomfortable or just plain bewildered by all of the “craziness” going on around him.  TriniWeddings often counsels brides who ask about the father’s role.

While many may see him as the walking, breathing checkbook for this event, his role is really more important.  His most important job is to be supportive of the bride’s decisions in most areas.  Certainly family discussions will take place, but once a decision is made, Dad’s support is invaluable.  He may be at the point where he feels that he is losing his little girl, but his support is priceless to her.

His official duties as father of the bride include riding to the ceremony with the bride (where appropriate).  He escorts the bride down the aisle on his right arm, and then joins his wife in the front pew (unless other arrangements take precedence. I once had a bride who hated the suit her dad was wearing, she felt it did not complement the dress she was wearing and did not want him escorting her down the aisle “in that suit”. She found it was old fashioned and he had spent a small fortune on it and he loved it.  TriniWeddings had to mediate and it was resolved amicably.

As the official host of the reception, he mingles with the guests.  He may or may not stand in the receiving line if there is one. That is really his call and he should not be forced to do this. Some dads like it and others do not.

He generally keeps an eye on the bar and champagne supply and makes a short toast at the reception.

Traditionally, he has a short dance with the bride after she dances first with the groom.

Finally, he is the last person to leave the reception and say goodbye to the guests.

He may still pay the majority of the wedding costs and sign the bill for the reception, but in today’s weddings, many costs are shared.

His presence provides a sense of continuity to the event and his love and support for his daughter is a comfort to all.

WEDDING PLANNING TIPS

We know that it takes a happy combination of events and planning to produce a “perfect” wedding.  Here are a few tips from TriniWeddings.

·         If you are concerned about a guest list that has gotten out of hand and is too long for your taste or budget, assemble an unedited list of names (potential guests) and ask everyone involved to rank the names from most to least important. If when you check   the “most important” names,    it falls within your budget or is close, thank everyone and settle the list.  If the numbers are still off, then ask people to cut a designated percentage from their lists.  Take stock of the new total and see if the process needs to be repeated.

·         Some people make an “A” List of Guests and then a “B” List. After someone from the “A” List declines, they then invite someone from the “B” list. Please do not consider doing this because it ends up being an after thought. Your invitations have been out there, have been discussed and the person who is receiving their own after everyone knows that they were not originally invited. It is very “Kardashian”! and shows poor taste!

·         To determine the size of the site you’ll need for your reception, be sure to investigate the  parking  facilities and the rest rooms as well as the size of the hall. The rule of thumb for toilets is that there should be at least one for every 25 guests.  The parking lot should accommodate one parking space for every two guests.

·         Always have at least one attendant assigned to your gift table at the reception even if you are not planning to open and display the gifts there.  You would be surprised at how many gifts go missing.  Money gifts should be kept in special receptacles and secured.  When I am leaving a wedding I always make sure to hand the money gifts to the Mother of the Bride or another person designated by the couple. People seem always to forget to make transport arrangements for the gifts and the cake and at the end of the wedding there is a mad scramble to ask people to help with transportation.

·         If parents and stepparents are contributing money for your reception, it is much better to pool the money in advance.  Then no contributor will demand to take control of how the money is spent.  If someone feels strongly about “sponsoring” a particular wedding expense, it is far better to know that up front so that you can work with that person to accommodate preferences.

For more helpful advice, call 868 624 4015 or email   info@triniweddings.com  for answers to your most perplexing situations.

Centerpiece Ideas (cont'd)

I had shared some centerpiece ideas on my blog in July. Here are some more:-

There is a wide variety of centerpiece options which complement the theme of the wedding and/or reflect the couple’s search for “something unique”!

 Traditional floral arrangements, complete the look of elegance and can reflect the bride’s chosen color palette. They work beautifully as long as the arrangements are either low enough (under 12-14 inches) or high enough (at least 30 inches) so that guests can converse across the table – or at least see each other.  Formal arrangements in glass or silver containers send one message, while daisies or sunflowers in canning jars send another.

With the changing view of wedding cakes, many brides are opting to make desert the centerpiece of guest tables.  Cupcake trees, lollipop cakes, cookie and dessert bar assortments and miniature versions of the bridal cake make perfect centerpiece options.

Guest favors artfully arranged on clear plastic or glass trays work well when accompanied by thank you notes from the bride and groom.

Candles of varying heights and shapes arranged on mirrors make a wonderful centerpiece for each table and the accumulated impact can be breathtaking. However, be sure to check the reception hall’s cooling system.  If  air is going to be blowing over the tables, your candles won’t last long.  If your reception is in a tented area, think about LED tapers instead of actual candles.

Some brides have made the wine being served with dinner an integral part of the centerpiece.  With some greenery and/or wrapped cheese miniatures the different bottles make an intriguing focal point.

Another idea is to collect a variety of glass serving pieces and fill them with beverages (or water) the theme color of the wedding.

Framed photos of the bride and groom as children grouped in the center of the table, work well as centerpieces and conversation starters.

For more good ideas contact  TriniWeddings at 868 624-4015, we will be happy to help you with your choices.

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Avoid being a Bridezilla

We all realize that the bride and groom are the focal points of this very special day. The wedding and its celebration are milestones in individual lives and family memories. It is a significant social and personal event that deserves the attention given it.

But what many of us have learned is that the weddings that are most remembered are those which consider the family and friends who will be joining the couple in celebrating the event.

Here are some ways brides and grooms can focus on guests and family.
 Remember to treat attendants like the friends they are – not servants. They are expending time and treasure to celebrate with you. Certainly they are there to support your wishes, but not to grant your every whim. Consideration and gratitude are welcome gifts to wedding party participants.
 When you are developing your gift registries, remember to include items for all price ranges. Friends and family members want to give you as nice a gift as they can. Spend some time making thoughtful choices.
 Select reception food that most guests will enjoy. If you are planning an ethnic specialty, be sure to include an alternative. Not every guest will welcome unfamiliar food.
 If music is to be played during cocktails and/or dinner, make sure it is background music soft enough so that people can hear themselves and others talk.
 If you are having dancing at your wedding, make sure that the band or DJ plays some “golden oldies” so that parents and/or grandparents and their friends can dance too.
 Don’t micro manage everything. Once plans are in place let vendors you’ve hired do what you hired them to do.
 For everyone’s sake, try to limit the time delay between the end of the ceremony and the start of the reception to one hour or less. If it must be longer, arrange something for the guests to do while they are awaiting your arrival. No one wants to go home and come back again.
Remember that this is one of the biggest parties you and your family will ever give. Make it memorable for your guests. Call TriniWeddings at 868 624-4015 or email mwilt@triniweddings.com to have a glitch free wedding.

　

Are Bridesmaids’ Gifts Necessary?

 

If you are wondering whether you NEED to buy gifts for your bridesmaids, the answer is no. But before you heave a sigh of relief, think about what those 3 or 4 or 5 friends are doing for you. They are buying a dress, shoes and maybe a headpiece of some sort. They are giving up a weekend for you. They are attending one or more showers on your behalf and are no doubt also giving you a wedding gift. I believe that you should show your gratitude. If you choose to do this by giving a gift then the gift should be accompanied by a huge thank you for being a part of the most important event of your life.

Appropriate gifts can be jewelry, accessories for their bridesmaids outfits, personal items, monogrammed items or items in their personal favorite colors. These gifts are given either during a bridesmaid’s luncheon, bachelorette party or given at the rehearsal dinner along with the groom’s gifts to his attendants.

More and more brides are electing to host a spa day for all of the attendants. A day of personal attention and luxury is sometimes marred by the conflict of schedules kept by very busy women but most would agree that it is worth the rearranging required to make it happen.

If you have attendants coming from out of town it would be a nice gift to contribute to the transportation if you are able and/or provide accommodations for her/their stay.

In addition, we are hearing of more and more brides sending thank you floral arrangements to the bridesmaid’s place of work once she has returned. People love getting flowers delivered at work, but this of course, depends on the workplace and if such a delivery is appropriate. If the workplace is not an option then the flowers or plant can be sent to her home with a special card attached.

For some wonderful ideas about what to give and when to give it, call us at TriniWeddings.

Is a Wedding Rehearsal necessary?

Unless you are planning to elope or have a Civil ceremony, you and your wedding party should participate in a wedding rehearsal. Even if you have been a bridesmaid in six of your friends’ weddings, this is your wedding and you will need to have a run through.

The things you will want to cover are:
The order of the processional and recessional where you will determine who walks with who and who stands where and for how long.
  The location of the photographer and videographer as well as any musicians who may be part of the ceremony.
 
What music will be played - when will it be played and for how long.
 
Who will cue the wedding party to enter and exit.
 
The offiiciant’s instructions and cues for vows, reading, music and movement.
 
The duties of the flower girl, ring bearer, best man and maid of honor.

Who will run the rehearsal?
It is usually handled by the wedding planner you have been working with and/or the wedding coordinator from the church or synagogue where you will be married.
 
The officiant will have input and the final word.
 
You may want to ask a family member or friend to oversee the rehearsal to make sure all the questions are covered, but be careful not to choose someone who could be at home on a battlefield. These are not orders to be given, but friendly and caring requests.

You are about to star in the biggest “show” you have ever been in. No show goes to Broadway without weeks of rehearsal. You are asking for your bridal party’s attention for about one hour and after which you should feed them and thank them at your rehearsal dinner.

Make an appointment with TriniWeddings for ideas on how to make both parts of the evening festive.

Photo Tips

After all the planning and purchasing and partying, what remains are the treasured photographs of your wedding day.  For many brides, the album and collections of photos are the most important record of the biggest day of their lives.    We have worked with many brides and enjoy seeing their photos when they return from their honeymoon.  We continue to add to the tips we share with brides on how to insure that they love the results of the photographic record of their wedding day.

·         If the ceremony and reception are going to be big, make sure the photographer you hire works with an assistant at least.  Many consultants will say that as a rule, one should plan on one photographer per 100 guests, but a skilled professional with an efficient assistant should be able to handle your ceremony and formal photos without a problem. 

·         Reception photos require a few formal shots and some informal/occasion specific photographs.

·         If you have special photos you want taken, be sure to make a list of those shots and review them with the photograph prior to the ceremony.  If out of town family members are attending and you want large family shots, let the photographer know that as well.

·         Consider having many of your formal and unique shots taken before the ceremony.  Your makeup is fresh, the gown unwrinkled, your hair fabulous and you have the glow of anticipation.

Besides, it will cut down on the time spent on photographs before your reception.

·         Spend time before the wedding showing the photographer some photos you’ve had taken in the past that you like.  He/She will get a sense of your good side and how best to position you.

·         When you are posing for formal shots, don’t just stand there full face on to the camera.  Take a tip from pros and remember to put your weight on your back leg.  It doesn’t matter which one – left or right.  Then place the other leg slightly in front and face the camera.  This will provide a more pleasing angle from which to be photographed.

·         Ask your personal attendant to stay close and have pressed powder and lip-gloss handy for shots.  Keep the shine on your face down and on your lips up.

For other tips and advice on how to look your best for those lasting memories, chat with a TriniWeddings professional consultant.

The Grooms’ Role

Contrary to previous rumors, grooms do have more to do than just “show up at the church on time”.  There may be some who choose not to be involved in the wedding planning process, but many of today’s grooms are interested in helping to plan this milestone moment in their lives.  They want to make the wedding itself a truly shared experience.  Anna Post assembled the list below for the Emily Post Web site.

Each of these “duties” will not only help the wedding planning process, but will truly make the groom feel more a part of the plans.  He certainly can help searching out and selecting the venue for the ceremony and reception, establishing the budget, creating the guest list, making gift registry selections and the critical job of keeping his parents in the loop regarding wedding plans.

In addition to these functions, the groom’s list includes:

• Selecting the engagement ring – though these days brides may also be involved in selection.
• Choosing his wedding party – best man, groomsmen and ushers.
• Choosing the attire for the groom’s wedding party – in keeping with the style of the wedding.
• Selecting the thank you gifts for his wedding party.
• Selecting the bride’s wedding gift.
• Compiling the groom’s part of the guest list and making sure that his parents provide their guest list in a timely manner.
• Choosing the wedding bands together.
• Arranging for and purchasing the marriage license.
• Arranging for transportation from the ceremony to the reception site.
• Standing in the receiving line if there is one and if there isn’t then greeting all the guests at the reception along with the bride.
• Dancing the first dance with the bride, dancing with the couple’s respective mothers and the maid/matron of honor.
• Making appropriate toasts at both the rehearsal dinner(if there is one) and the reception.

Insuring That the Tuxedo or Suit Fits

 

There is the choice of having your tuxedo or suit made by a professional tailoring establishment or renting one from a formalwear specialist. Whether you choose to rent or purchase, it is important to choose a reputable formalwear dealer or established tailoring establishment to insure a good fit for members of your wedding party. You ought to work closely with the specialist to insure that the style of tuxedo or suit chosen for the groom and groomsmen will make all the men look their best as well as coordinate with the bride’s party.

Whether you have chosen to have your suits/tuxedos made or rented the following applies. Once the style is chosen the groom and the best man should take an active role in insuring that all male members of the wedding party get fitted well in advance of the wedding date.  A little basic knowledge about sizing men’s suits will help this process proceed more smoothly. 

I have found the following guidelines to be helpful with fittings:

• Jackets – A man should be able to fit his hand between his chest and the front of the jacket when it is buttoned.  Back vent (s) should lie flat. The coat should allow free movement of the arms.  Armholes should not be snug. It should fasten easily and not bind.  It should fall smoothly across the back and should not bunch up across the shoulders when the arms move forward.
• Jacket length – for most standard jackets, the bottom of the jacket should reach the curl of the fingers when the arms are held straight down at the sides.  This allows the shirt cuff to show ½ to l inch.

·        Trousers – should sit at the waist and fit the waist allowing the width of one finger inside the waistband.  Trousers are hemmed so that they barely break as they rest on top of the shoes.  They should fall smoothly in the back to just the top of the heel of the shoe.  Most formal trousers are not cuffed.

·        Vests should button comfortably across the chest.  Vest buttons should line up with the front of the jacket and overlap the waistband on the trousers.

While many men may fuss about having to wear formal clothes, the truth is men look fabulous in well tailored/fitted tuxedos or suits. Members of the wedding party should be cooperative at the fitting and should be on time to try on the clothing so that there is time for any needed adjustments to be made.

Should you need to know where you can get rented suits or tuxedos  or need any type of consultation for your pending wedding call TriniWeddings at 624-4015. Our consultation fees are quite affordable.

How To Be A Good Guest

An invitation is coming your way from a family member or a good friend or both.  It is an honor to be selected to help the couple celebrate a wonderful part of their life.

If you RSVP with a positive response, you become an official guest at this party.  You will no doubt bring an appropriate wedding gift, but did you know that another gift you give to the couple is the knowledge of how to be a good guest, and the wisdom to use that knowledge.

Here is a checklist of do’s and don’t that you can follow to insure that your behavior will not cause the couple to grimace on their 10^th anniversary as they recall events from their wedding.

 

DO

• Make sure to send your RSVP in a timely manner.
• Arrive at the wedding at least 10 minutes before the ceremony is to begin.
• Stay standing at the back of the church if you are going to be late.
• Keep your cell phone on silent.
• Dress appropriately.
• Have fun dancing but do not call attention to yourself or your partner.
• Respect the couple’s wishes even if they aren’t what you would choose.

DON’T

• Change your mind about attending so that you cancel and then show up anyway.
• Sit in a front row.  That is for the immediate family only.
• Text or tweet or blog during the ceremony
• Wear jeans or other inappropriate wear unless requested by the couple
• Get in the way of the professional photographer doing his job.
• Trash talk the couple’s choices.

Setting the Date

He asked and you said “yes”.  Congratulations to you both.  Your engagement period signals the beginning of a wonderful and exciting time in your lives.  Where to start?  Setting the date!

As you consider various dates, times and places for your wedding, here are some points to think about.

• Think about your budget.  It is true that some months are more expensive than others.  (Think about the Law of Supply and Demand you learned in Econ 101).  In popular months like June and December some reception locations, photographers, florists and DJs may charge more for their services.  If you can wait for a less crowded month, you may be able to stage the same wedding for less money.

• Think about the season.  If you have been dreaming of a Christmas wedding your whole life, then go for it.  But think about the time needed for preparations and plan accordingly.  If you want a certain church, a certain reception site and a certain gown and flowers, you may have to adjust time frames.  Your answer is to book early and be prepared to be flexible on dates and/or times.

• If you are on a fast track at work or have a job that requires huge blocks of your time, be sure to engage the services of a professional wedding consultant.  He/she will end up saving you both time and sanity (and maybe even money).

• Consider scheduling your wedding around a holiday.  That can give you both a theme for the wedding and time for your out of town guests to attend.

• If your plans include a destination wedding, you will need to be more flexible in your dates and times.  Decide which is more important – the date of the wedding or the place of the wedding.  Once that decision is made, you can proceed.

At TriniWeddings we are used to working with schedules and helping busy brides create a schedule for your event and follow through with all the details necessary to create a day to remember for you and your guests.

“With this Ring, I do thee Wed”

We think the history behind the wedding traditions we’ve come to know is fascinating.  For example, the engagement process was nearly as important as the wedding itself. Weddings were arranged primarily for political and/or business reasons and not necessarily for the notion of “romantic love”.

In the days when brides were stolen, the bride’s family would insist on being reimbursed for what was considered a working member of the family.  The engagement signified the transfer of ownership from father to husband and covered a period of time during which families would negotiate and agree on the “price” of the bride.

The wedding band came to symbolize eternal love because it has neither a beginning nor an ending.  The tradition of using one grew out of the ancient custom of using circlets of grass to decorate a bride’s wrist and ankles.  Although not required to validate a marriage under civil law, rings came to be required during the 16^th century after a ruling from the Council of Trent. 

Today, rings are not required by law in order for a marriage to be legal, but few couples wed without exchanging rings as part of the ceremony. 

Choosing the Music to Celebrate

Selecting the music for a wedding ceremony and reception is an important consideration.  Music should frame the ceremony – not dominate it.  Picking the music should be considered an important aspect of the planning process.

1.        Make an early meeting with the officiant/pastor/priest a must.  Churches tend to have constraints imposed on the kind of music allowed.  It is good to have that information early in the planning process.

Some churches limit the options by presenting the bride a list of music from which she must choose.  Others may opt to screen her choices.

2.        If the bride wants a certain music that is important to her and/or the groom, and the church organist can’t/won’t play it, she has the option of diplomatically asking if she can bring in her own musicians.  More and more brides are requesting instruments other than the organ.  Some brides want to be lead up or down the aisle by violins.  Others prefer the sounds of a string quartet.  Allowing sufficient lead-time to clarify any issues around music is a smart move.

3.       Brides must remember that music needs to be selected for the prelude, the processional, the ceremony and for the reception.  Musicians need to be chosen and booked early in the process.

4.       Many budget conscious brides are opting to use MP3 players or other electronic media for reception music – either during the cocktail hour or as background music during dinner.

5.       The bride should spend time researching her music.  Screen pieces, listen to tapes, CDs, and take advice from musicians you know.  Audition any musicians before hiring them.  Check references. Volumes of advice and suggestions are available online.  Think about your own personal preferences and music that matters to you both as a couple as you assemble your “must play list”.

Many couples are creating a CD of their favorite music and making it available as a thank you gift or favor  to their guests.

For other ideas about the role of music in your wedding, talk with an experienced TriniWeddings consultant.

How much should your wedding cost?

The answer –as much or as little as you can afford!  You can have a lavish event that tops $200,000TT or you can say your vows and entertain your close friends and family for $5000TT.   It all depends.  If you are planning a wedding on a budget, TriniWeddings offers some dollar saving tips.

·         Avoid a wedding in the traditional wedding months of April, June and December.  As couples compete for vendors and venues, prices rise – because they can. 

·         Look closely at your guest list.  Pare it down to include only those persons who are really close and have meaning in your life.

·         Have your ceremony and reception in the same place if your religion allows for this. You can save on decor costs.

·         Choose an hour when a meal is not appropriate or necessary.  Morning weddings followed by a lovely basic brunch or a later afternoon ceremony followed by a cocktail reception are wonderful options.

·         Use tropical flowers and fill bouquets with more ribbons and greenery and fewer flowers.

·         Rather than investing in large floral arrangements in the church and reception areas, consider using rental greenery.  It will fill spaces and create more warmth than large stylized arrangements can.

·         At TriniWeddings we can save you time as well as money; and most importantly help assure you of one perfect day.

Be honest about your budget and stick with it.  Look for ways to economize but know which items are the dearest to you.  Always remember that it is the marriage that is important – not the frills.  Feel free to discuss your plans and concerns with TriniWeddings.  We can help you have a gorgeous wedding and save you money in the process.

Etiquette on a Budget

Quiet elegance is always in style.

Consider a few white lilies for the bridal bouquet instead of an elaborate arrangement.

An afternoon tea or garden luncheon can be as charming as a 5 course sit down dinner.

Select fewer attendants. The larger the wedding and number of attendants, the greater the expense.

But no matter how limited the budget, the rules of etiquette still apply.

Having a reception which serves only punch and cake is acceptable. Asking guests to buy their own dinners is not.

Having an alcohol free reception is fine. Having a cash bar isn’t.

Registering for things the couple would like and need is fine. Asking for money instead of gifts isn’t.

Sending email invitations instead of printed or handwritten ones for a small intimate wedding isn’t OK.

Neglecting to send thank you notes within an acceptable time frame is not appropriate.

Every part of a wedding, even one done on a very limited budget, should be done with style and good taste. An affordable wedding can be just as memorable as a lavish one. Guests will remember the beautiful personal touches, not how much was spent on the wedding.

If you have questions about any aspect of wedding etiquette do stop in a talk with us at TriniWeddingd. We are here to help you have the wedding you want.

　

Vera Wang & Arthur Becker Split: Renowned Designer Announced Her Split

 

On Thursday, the heralded wedding apparel designer Vera Wang announced that she was separating from her husband of 23 years, Arthur Becker. Becker has helped Wang build her bridal empire and reportedly has a huge stake in the brand.

However, Mario Grauso, President of Wang's company told Women's Wear Daily, that the former couple will not let this impact the running of the company. They have worked too hard to build it up."

In a statement released the company informed the public that the couple of 23 years, "Vera Wang and Arthur Becker have mutually and amicably agreed to separate... They remain devoted parents to their two daughters," as reported by People's.

The couple married in 1989 at New York's Pierre Hotel and have two daughters Cecilia and Josephine.

In addition to her luxury bridal company, Wang recently collaborated with David's Bridal to create a line of affordable bridal gowns and accessories for the discount retailer. Her Fall 2012 Bridal Collection which featured an entire line of black wedding gowns created quite a stir in the bridal fashion world. In fact, Las Angeles Times (with intended pun obviously) reported on the spilt saying "the black wedding gowns could have been a bad omen."

Her 2013 Fall Collection contains nudes, blushes and scarlet reds, no blacks, but neither the traditional whites. Her most notable gowns have been for a-list celebrities and public figures including Chelsea Clinton, Alicia Keys, Ivanka Trump and most recently Kim Khardashian.

Questions for a Wedding Planner

Should you hire a wedding planner or are you preparing to do it all yourself? Most busy working brides today need the help of a professional planner – for all or part of their weddings. A professional wedding planner’s advice and expertise can save time, money and sanity so don’t dismiss the idea out of hand.

When you meet with a wedding planner to talk about how much or how little you need him/her to do for your wedding, here are six key questions you should ask to guide that informational meeting.

1. Here are the vendors and venues I am considering using. Do you know anything about them? Who are your favorites and why?

The planner can often give you some good feedback about a particular vendor and/or steer you away from potential trouble.

2. How many weddings of my size have you done?

If you are planning on a small intimate gathering and the planner specializes in huge society weddings, you two may not be a good match.

3. If I hire you for my wedding, what is your role and what is mine?

It is a good idea to have clarity around who is responsible for what and in a tight situation, who has the final say? Do need to have the planner clear every little detail with you or can he/she make decisions based on early parameters you two have established?

4. How many weddings do you do each month? Do you have enough staff to cover all weddings you book? You don’t want to be one of a multitude in June if the planner doesn’t have the staff to handle all of its commitments.

5. Ask for a client and vendor list and ask if you may call them for references.

6. Ask for an explanation of how he/she charges. Is there a flat rate, a sliding scale, extra charges for add ons?

7. Do you belong to any professional organizations? Associations such as Weddings Beautiful Worldwide, ISES and The Association of Bridal Consultants have helped increased the value, and raise the professional standards of wedding planners everywhere.

The goal of all good wedding planners is to save you time and money . . . and most importantly for you to enjoy one perfect day!

　

　

Selecting Gifts For Your Registry

Selecting locations for the gift registries for one’s wedding is important and fun. For your guest’s sake, it is wise to select at least three different resources. Your purpose is to give guests a variety of options and price ranges when it comes time to select your gift. To that end, experts recommend that you choose at a minimum, one “high-end” store, one moderate/lower priced retailer and perhaps one “non traditional” resource like a charity.

As you peruse items for your gift choices, most consultants would remind you to expand your vision of gifts to include items beyond the “usual”. Many couples end up realizing that they have the best equipped kitchen in town, but have no bedroom furnishings. Seek input and advice from friends and family before you sit down together to develop your list of preferences. Their ideas may help you to include items that would be helpful that you would never have considered.

REAL SIMPLE magazine asked brides to identify items for the “Things I Wished I’d Registered For” list they were compiling. Here are some of the items that made the list
                     
*Extra Wine Glasses

*Oven to table bake ware – one or two casseroles that can go to parties and events and    look good.

*Fine China – too many couples are selecting only something practical to use now. Brides miss having some fine china to use for special occasions and to “pass on”

*Bar B Q Grill

*Art pieces for home décor (consider including an art gallery in your list of registry locations

*A cordless drill

*Decorative pillows and throws for the living room – a quick and effective way to add dash

*Christmas decorations – something special and classic that the couple could bring out each year


*Outdoor gear and equipment like Coleman stoves, backyard hammocks or lawn chairs.

For more help with your gift registry, consult with TriniWeddings.

The Role of the Wedding Planner

If the bride and her family would like a stress free wedding, the best solution is to hire a wedding planner.  If the wedding is to be at an out of town/destination wedding, then dependence on a planner at the venue to which the wedding party will be traveling is a must.  If the bride and groom are planning a small intimate wedding and reception but the couple both have jobs that demand huge time commitments, a wedding planner can take the couple’s wishes and instructions and produce exactly the event they envision.

The term planner can cover a wide range of services.  In general the term refers to services provided by an individual, selected by the bride or her mother, to assist with some or all of the details involved in the planning and implementing of an error-free, stress free rehearsal, ceremony and reception.   A plus feature in hiring a wedding planner or coordinator is that the bride can decide the level of service she desires and pay only for those services.

Brides-to-be should determine the credentials of the planner they are considering.  They should check the training/certification that the planner has earned.  They should ask for references from two or three brides the planner has served and decide on the level of involvement they will require.  Maybe an initial consultation to help identify choices and set preliminary plans and schedules is enough for one couple.  Others may want a comprehensive package, which covers time and advice on all aspects of the wedding plus vendor and site negotiations.

Do make an appointment with a TriniWeddings consultant. This can make a valuable and beautiful difference in YOUR wedding.